On a quest to make a web series packed with jokes, romance and mops. - View our pilot at youtube.com/ultracleantv

Saturday, October 27, 2012

What's that? I'm in a Web Series? Okay cool!

I've heard that the best way to tell a story is to start at the end briefly, then to go back to the beginning and work your way back to the end, giving a chance for different characters to show their perspectives. However, I don't have time for that. I have funerals to go to (Horrible skiing accident, don't ask) So I'll make this as brief as I can.

As actors, its easy to become naturally pessimistic. It happens and it's perfectly normal. It's just how we cope with working in a very competitive business. Being told that you're not right for a role because you look to young, or your nose is the wrong shape, or crotch-less jeans are inappropriate attire for an audition-- well, it helps give you a thick skin. As well as this, we've all been involved in projects that have fallen through. Film projects are notorious for this. That's why we try and avoid getting over excited when fun jobs come up. However, containing my excitement when Trit told me about Ultra Clean proved to be impossible.

A few months ago I was involved in a show with the other cast members called The Playwright's Dozen. Unbeknownst to us, Tristram came and saw it. He must have liked what he saw because a few days later, he added me on Facebook and told me that he really enjoyed the play I wrote "Ones and Zeros". I put the enjoyment factor of that play on the performances of Ollie Brylynsky and Jack Gow rather than my writing but what evs.

Anyway, about a month ago, we were told that a comedy Web Series called Ultra Clean had been written and we were being considered for roles. "Hell to the yes!" I yelled out loud as fellow bus passengers looked at me with what I can only describe as a combination of disgust and annoyance. After I got kicked off the bus, I read the synopsis. It was really something else. Exactly my kind of humour which is both amazing and kind of creepy. The characters are so well written and the dynamics between the four Ultra Clean members is really going to drive this show along. Ollie, Tina and Tara are all amazing actors and their involvement guaranteeing that this will be an amazing show to work on.

In just over a month, we've met three times, had table reads, rehearsals, production photos taken, found a production company and set up locations for shooting a pilot. This is going to be a rollercoaster ride, so keep your arms and legs in the cart at all times and if you vomit all over yourself, well...I know a good team of cleaners who can help fix that right up.

Thankyou for sitting through what is sure to be the worst written and least funny of all the posts on this blog. Let me reward you with a picture of a happy puppy!


What? That's what happiness looks like, right?

Right!?







Thursday, October 25, 2012

Terrible Photos of Rehearsals

We had rehearsals for the pilot last night, which were fantastic.  The actors were really clicking in the roles and we had lots of big laughs.  It was a joy.  To remember this event, I took a selection of terrible photos.





This is the first terrible photo I took.  It's very blurry and I don't know what our director John is doing in this shot.  It looks like he's miming leaning on a steering wheel with his arm, although I'm not even sure that's his arm, because it's so blurry.  It could be a child's leg.

This photo isn't terrible for Tara, because she's captured quite clearly.  It's not even that terrible for Tina, who's quite blurry, but at least looks happy about it.  It is terrible for Ollie though.  Sorry, Ollie.  I don't know what to say.  Also, aficionados will notice that what the actors are doing is not rehearsing.  It's sitting/leaning on things and listening to someone talk.  This was a recurring theme of my rehearsals photos.

This is the least terrible of the terrible rehearsals photos.  But it's still terrible.  No one is rehearsing, and James looks a bit angry (which he wasn't, but terrible photos have a way of telling their own stories).  At least Ollie is in focus - or is he?

This last one is definitely the most terrible of my terrible rehearsals photos.  It hits two home runs straight away, in that it's out of focus and it doesn't capture anyone in the act of rehearsing.  Added to that is the bizarre framing, which is like something a Swedish film director would do if he was terrible.  I think what I really wanted to capture with this shot was a wall, but I was willing to allow two of the people who attended rehearsals in on either side of that wall (wall permitting).

So, yes, the photos are terrible.  But the rehearsals were amazing, and that's what really matters here.  After all, the success of a series does not come down to the scriptwriter's ability to capture photos on his smart phone.  I'm sure Aaron Sorkin's photos of rehearsals for The Newsroom were terrible.  And that show turned out to be... not terrible.  Case closed, good night.

Monday, October 22, 2012

Piloting

I'm excited!  We're making our pilot!

(You know what a pilot is, right?  It's the first episode of a TV or web series, which acts as a trial run to see if financiers want to go ahead with more episodes of the show.)

Since we all understand the term, please join me in my excitement over the fact that we're making our 'on spec' pilot!

(You know what 'on spec' means, right?  It means we're making the pilot without financial backing.  We're counting on the fact that sponsors will be so impressed by our product that they'll pay for it - and for the remaining 11 episodes of the series.)

Now you can definitely join with me in one voice to express excitement about our 'on spec' inter-erectile pilot!

(I made up the term "inter-erectile".  It's not a thing.)

John and I truly are over the moon that we're making the pilot for Ultra Clean.  The accomplished and adventurous Action Productions team was impressed with our concept and has decided to partner on the show with us.  It's great news for us, because it means our pilot will be slick, professional and ready for broadcast - whether that's via web or television.  We've set a shooting date in mid-November, so we've only got a few weeks to get our Toilet Ducks in a row.  That was a joke, because Ultra Clean is a show about cleaning and Toilet Duck is used to clean toilets.

We're meeting with the actors for a rehearsal this week, where we'll be nailing down the performances and the characters.  When you're making a pilot, you're actually establishing a huge part of what the show as a whole will be like.  Do we want a character to speak with a lisp?  Do we want all the characters to speak with lisps?  If we're going to make the world's first all-lisp sitcom, that's a call we have to make now.  This week.

The other reason rehearsal is important for us is that we'll be shooting our whole pilot in a day.  We won't have time to work things out while we shoot, so everyone will need to know what they're doing.  It's going to require almost military timing on the behalf of the whole cast and crew.

And, in summary, that's why I'm excited.  Because I love the military.  Go troops!!

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Let's film a pilot

Well, just under a week after we started the discussions with various production houses to help us create this original look at the workplace comedy, we found a company keen to help us with a pilot (and hopefully our full series).

I would like to formally announce our partnership with 'Action Productions Australia' and an amazing like-minded Writer/Director/Producer Darren J Burns.

So what's next? Well we are looking at a date in November to film our pilot episode and from there we have an amazing opportunity to pitch our best possible version of the already strong first episode of 'Ultra Clean'.

Are we excited? You damn right we are!

We will continue updating this blog with the process and we look forward to continue with our plan to make this show hit your screens sometime in early 2013!

Cheers!

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Less Is More (and all that)

John's and my meetings have been going well so far.  The production companies we've spoken to have responded to our pitch and can see the potential in our web series.  More to go and we'll keep you posted, dearest blog reader.

In the meantime, here's a great article about how sitcoms are getting shorter and shorter.  If you haven't seen it, Childrens Hospital is brilliant.

Monday, October 15, 2012

Meetings

We're having meetings this week.  I've been studying this instructional video from our computer overlords and as a result I'm now confident that I know what a meeting is.






Thursday, October 11, 2012

Cast photos

As promised, here are some more pictures of our wonderful Ultra Clean cast. 







James Chapman as Hunterr
Tina Cornac as Marissa
Oliver Brylynsky as Dan
Tara Gallop-Brennan as Gabby
A team called "Ultra Clean"

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

A Teaser Pic

Here's a teaser pic of the Ultra Clean team.  More to follow in the coming days!








Moving things along

Well, what a hectic few days that was. As the previous post confirmed, we have a cast!
What a cast they are, they laugh at my terrible jokes! But in all seriousness they are really great to work with, and this can now move along even further.

Today we all got together to do some promotional shots (will try and upload a small video by the end of this week) and basically get together again to talk our next step of the plan.

We are also discussing our future after the pilot, as any good pitch needs to know where it is going next. We are really building up to something great! We hope to be meeting up with production companies next week.

I guess the most ideal situation would be that we are filming (or even finished filming) the pilot by this time next month, so it's all getting serious here now.

Of course we will continue to blog about it to keep you all in the loop. (Or follow us on twitter @UltraCleanTV)

Finally, I didn't get bitten.
-John W

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

We Have Actors!

John and I met with four actors last night for the main roles in our web series, and it went exceptionally well!  For some reason our meeting took place in a soon-to-be-demolished building, which seems to have been largely appropriated by birds.  Possibly zombie birds.  We could hear them scratching at the walls and thumping at the windows, trying to get at us.  There were several times I swear I heard my name, hissed softly through a half-open beak.  But none of that distracted from our excellent meeting!

We did table reads of our first two scripts, and our actors showed a wonderful understanding of the material and great affinity with the characters.  Choosing a group of young actors who know each other and have worked together before has made our job much easier.  They’re a ready-made team, they've got chemistry together and they understand each other's rhythms.

John's a great director and he instantly formed a working rapport with the actors.  It was a joy to behold.  I've directed scripts I've written in the past, but I can't really see why I'd ever need to again if I can get John Wood to do it.  The guy was born to direct.

So... the big moment.  We are pleased to announce our cast for Ultra Clean:
  • James Chapman as Hunterr
  • Tina Cornac as Marissa
  • Oliver Brylynsky as Dan
  • Tara Gallop-Brennan as Gabby
I saw these guys perform as part of a showcase for their acting class called The Playwrights' Dozen just over a month ago and was mightily impressed.  In fact, the idea for Ultra Clean was born as I watched these talented actors ply their trade and thought "Someone should really make a web series with these guys, so he can blog about it".

Our actors are going to start blogging as well, to give their perspective on this experience.  Stay tuned for four different versions of "the night of the zombie birds".  Fun game: see if you can guess who was bitten by a zombie bird and is hiding it from the rest of us!

Thursday, October 4, 2012

How Do I Make A Web Series?

You might think that an article entitled “How do I make a web series?” would be full of helpful tips on how to make a web series, spelt out for you in easy-to-follow steps.  Not this one.  I’m actually asking.  How do I make a web series?

At this point I’m just a guy with an idea.  Admittedly, it’s a great idea.  It’s funny, it’s got heart, it’s got characters so richly imagined that Dickens and Dostoyevsky would have a knife fight over them.  But it is just an idea.  How do I go from that starting point to having something real up on the screen, to be enjoyed by all the differently-hued peoples of the world?

What I can say is that the first thing I did, after coming up with the concept for Ultra Clean and writing a couple of scripts, was to bring in John Wood as director.  John has a lot of directing experience  and – having met him through a theatre project last year – I know he’s got bucketloads of enthusiasm.  That’s the most important quality I can think of in any collaborator.  In John I know I’ve got someone who will help push the project forward.

“Okay,” I hear you say, “so you’ve got at least one step there.  Probably two.  You could write those down for us at least, lazyface.”  To that I say, while I don’t appreciate being called lazyface, I will do it, because I respond to assertiveness.

1.  Come up with good idea
2.  Find collaborator(s) to share your vision

Now I hear you say: “Tell us what you plan to do next.  And write it out in steps just like those two – otherwise I will force your jaws open and gently push my entire fist into your mouth.”  The things you’re saying are increasingly sinister, and maybe after I finish this blog post we should take a break from each other.  But okay.  Here’s what John and I plan to do next for Ultra Clean:

3.  Meet and cast actors
4.  Assemble art designs, logos and the ‘look’ of the series
5.  Pitch to production companies to make a pilot “on spec”
6.  Spend a day shooting the pilot
7.  Edit the pilot
8.  Use the pilot to generate interest from corporate sponsors
9.  Get paid to make a web series
10. Investigate good lawn care products

That last step isn’t strictly to do with making a web series, but it is something I need to do and 10 steps is a nice round number.

These steps are by no means set in concrete.  They’re sure to change as we proceed, but they provide a pretty good road map for where we intend to go.  In future blog posts we’ll expand on each step.  We’re meeting with actors early next week, for example, and we’re in the process of putting together the art elements of the show at the moment.

Stay with us and you’ll learn how to make a web series as we do.

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Welcome


Hi all!

Well, the blog is up and it's all exciting times here at the 'Ultra Clean' camp. I will confess when I first heard Tristram wanted me to do something involving cleaning I didn't assume a web-series, in fact I went the opposite and expected to actually, you know, clean!

Luckily (and obviously) that wasn't the case and here we are about a week later taking this seriously. I read the scripts and I was immediately excited about the key conceit of the show, like what Tristram said (read previous post), outdoor filming just bloody sucks. However filming in different houses every episode could prove to be even more interesting, but I look forward to raiding another house each work, and I hope the viewers do to.

I will upload new stuff to this blog, whether it will be a production still, something about the cast (when they are locked in) and even great behind the scenes videos.

Watch this space!
-John W

Beginnings

Every great project has a beginning.  The Titanic started with someone thinking “Wouldn’t it be great if we had a really massive ship?  I mean bigger than anyone could possibly think is reasonable?  We could build it and then be hubristically overconfident about the possibility of it ever sinking.  Sigh!”  The film Titanic began when James Cameron thought “Wouldn’t it be great if we had a really massive film?  I mean bigger than anyone could possibly think is reasonable?  We could make it and then 12 years later make a different massive film with blue people that earns more money than the one I’m talking about making now, but only after 3D sales are considered.  Sigh!”

As you can see, beginnings can be audacious, even crazy.  Beginnings are for dreamers.  Well, right now, dreaming is exactly what I’m doing.  I’ve come up with an idea for a web series.  If you don’t know what a web series is, have a look at three of my favourites: Wainy Days, Comedians In Cars Getting Coffee and Burning Love.  Making a web series is just like making long-form TV, except what you’re making is not long-form and it’s not for TV.  Imagine taking a  car and shrinking it down to the size of a much smaller car.  Now imagine cramming that smaller car full of clowns.  That’s a web series.

My idea for a web series is called Ultra Clean.  It’s a comedy about four friends who run a cleaning company together.  The concept is that each episode will be 5 or 6 minutes long and will take place in one of the houses that the team is cleaning.  Each week brings a different adventure in a different house.  The idea stems from my love of ensemble comedies like Cheers, Seinfeld and Community, and also from my knowledge that it’s damn hard to find locations to shoot low-budget productions.  I’ve always found that the easiest place to shoot a short film is inside someone’s house.  You don’t have to worry about wind, or rain, or people driving by in cars and shouting “Pinch a handful of my genitals!” in the middle of a perfect take.  Dramatically, I also like the idea of a confined space, meaning there’s no escape-valve on conflicts that build up between characters.

As soon as I came up with the idea for Ultra Clean, I scribbled down a couple of scripts, which I then fiddled with until I felt they were funny.  My scripts feature a bossy character, a wisecracking character, a ditzy character and a character who was born in prison.  This what's known as the holy quadrinity of situation comedy.  Once I finished polishing the scripts, I sent them to a director I know called John Wood.  He liked them and we met to talk about the project.

What lies ahead of us now involves casting, rewrites, art design, rehearsals, rewrites, pitching, sponsorship, rewrites, shooting and rewrites.  I may be overstating the number of rewrites, but probably not.  We’re starting this blog so we can capture all the highs and lows of a web series production, right from the very beginning.  It’s going to be quite a ride and we don’t know exactly what’s going to happen.  Will Ultra Clean be James Cameron’s Titanic, raking in piles of cash, winning awards and irritating viewers, or will it be the actual Titanic, rusting away at the bottom of the sea?  No one can say.  (Spoiler: it’s the first one.)